Today

Today was a hard one. It was Monday. Yet that was not it. It was cold and dreary from a late Sunday gentle snow. Still not it. The radio told me it was the most depressing day of the year. I know, I changed the station. Nope I don't believe that was it either. My period is in full swing and had me snapping at the nice man that pays me. I know that was not it either, trust me I know. Today was some sort of a funk that hung over me, right over my head. I could see it when I looked in the mirror in the bathroom. Then when I drove home in the cold blue dark early night, I came upon it. A song came on. Just a song. A song with words that were sung just to me in my car. A song I had only heard one time before. It was the trigger to my gun. Bang, it was pulled, released. Tears came to my eyes, pricked my eye balls, pooled and then jumped, rather escaped down my face and died alone, apart from each other on my pants. The song went something like, "I don't wanna be anything but what I been trying to be lately...tired of looking around to see who I am suppose to be or what I am suppose to do." Today was a day.