you can look at it this way or that

A friend of mine, well a good aquaintence really I guess, from my NYC stand up comedy days is in love. He did not tell me this directly cause we don't really chat anymore since I have moved to the eastern shore but from time to time we exchange emails and I like to read his blog to keep on top of what he is up to. We did not part on bad terms at all just parted. Our lives took different turns about a year ago that is all. He is a good guy and the one well one of the three performers I performed with on a regular basis and care about that I think will make it in the biz someday. Anyway...I went to his blog the other day and there was indication that he is madly in love. My first reaction? I smiled and said out loud, "good for that dude!" The funny good thing is that I truly and utterly meant it! That got me to thinking. Ut oh! I am not in a super duper spot in my life right now I do have to say. Not real focused or clear on my career and well just not as happy as I know I can and will be. I am doing a lot of digging and searching into my soul and that work is just hard and most of the time the main headqarters is not located in happyland yet the work and effort is necessary to get to that land - so why was my reaction so positive to his news when it could easily have been the opposite? I could have screamed out loud, rolled around on the floor, curled up in a fetal position in my bed and refused get up, or simply spit through perched lips venom of "why him and why not me? why is everyone else bloody in love and happy when I am not?" wow that sort of felt good, ha! It was an afterthought and not a first thought and for that I am jovial in fact. One can choose to see every situation, every occurance and interaction with others and life in so many ways and can do so at will. This fasicnates (what a funny word that is yes? fasicnating!) me and fills me with such hope and dare I say it? Happiness! I am ok, even beyond ok to even delight with the knowledge that someone has fallen, someone else is in love. This insight propels me to keep movin' on and upward, to keep going in this direction I've choosen, the path not gone down and to keep digging to get to China I mean Happyland. On a Friday one cannot ask for more than that...or at least it works for this little ole one here on the shore. (I like to call myself little ole one cause it is a play on words since I am NOT old and it also makes me feel skinny).