Last night

I dreamt of an old friend last night. She is young, our friendship is old, well from the past, a while back. Almost as if from an entirely different lifetime, world. That is the old part. It was an odd, weird sort of out of nowhere dream. I am not going to go into the details only because I find that when someone says, "oh man this dream I had last night was so weird" more times than not the dreams are not so much weird as they are boring! Incidently I don't mind when people call me "man" for I am secure in my feminity. So secure that I had to stop this dream story to point it out. Ahem, anyway, where was I? Ah, yes...
I have not heard from this friend in some time now. Nor has she heard from me in the same amount of time. I do think of her often and wonder what she is up to. Why she popped into my head last night in this dream I am not quite sure about but there she was. And now even as I am writing about her I cannot fully recall the specifics of the dream. Only that she was a main character and I was there as well...in the non dream world we simply lost touch. Stopped talking, sending letters and all communication just dropped one day. If my memory serves me correctly (I would prefer a man to serve me but hey it is all I got for now) I wrote to her last, called her last all to no response from her end. There was no big blow out, no misunderstanding. Just silence. This dream about her got me to thinking about friends, friendships, relationships of the past. Why some are still with me and why some are not. A sense of sadness covered me at first. A feeling that was so powerful it actually hurt in my heart. Then once it passed...it could have been from the pulled pork sandwich and crispy french fries I had just devoured for lunch but for story purposes I shall stick with that it was a sadness from a full realizaton of a loss. After the feeling of sadness passed and my heart was back to a normal steady beat, I felt calmed. I started thinking of all the times we spent together as friends this old friend of mine - laughing A LOT, drinking A LOT, dreaming about our futures A LOT, talking and telling secrets A LOT, making fun of people's fashion choices A LOT, crying A LOT, eating yummy food A LOT...living A LOT and getting through A LOT together. I felt myself smile A LOT as I ran through all the images of her and I in that time, that old time ago. I realized that she was my friend of that time and that what we went through and the friendship we had was for that time, what we both needed at that time. And now this time, this new time in my life I was fine without her. And for her as well fine without me. We met at that time for that time. Simple? Yes. Boring? Perhaps. A dream? Definitely.
P.S. Sorry for all the TIMEs.