tick tock tick tock

one more, well one and a half more days till no more 2007. What are you doing in these last hours of the year? What will you do in the new year, the big '08? a good friend last night said to me, "it is never too late" - original? nope. heard it before. yet for some reason last night it stroke a chord, hit a note, filled a void, ah you get the jist yes? Indeed it is never too late. So even in these last hours of '07 squeeze all you can out of 'em! Tick tock tick tock...

if only i could actually play

fantastic!

rain, wind, 40 degrees, brrr....nice to know, comforting, brilliant even knowing that someone amazing out there is thinking of me and smilin. thanks kd.

family

a family is a group of people in which you are given.
not by choice nor selection, more so some say by someone up there a livin.
i am not sure on all of that whether it be true or not,
i do only know one is in it with em, all stirring hot in a pot.
often there are days of love, laughter, and support,
and then there are days that follow as if 100 horses upon your chest have trot.
a test you do take with all at one time or another,
you pass, you fail, you float and you smother.
a holiday that causes a rise in emotion and scars
food of soul and taste shines light on healing as does a sky of stars.
a cheer, a smile, a nod of head and again i recall,
that all are my heart, my life blood and all would catch me if i fall.
the rain and wind outside can never freeze my warm heart,
for just down the hall, below downstairs and across the hall
the humans that know me and even when we part
carry me on the sleeve, within their soul, surrounding their heart.

christmas eve is upon us yet again...

what am i thankful for this christmas eve and truly all year round yet often forget or don't stop to reflect on it, even jot it down?

well...

McDonalds french fries, Chesterfield Ale, sushi, willingness to try new things including romantic relationships (even if not romantic, technically), the girls; tash, heather, deb and beth, my accident prone brother, dolan, dr. daddy, ramona, rosemary, and thyme, (hee), mix cds (of course it use to be tapes), chewy sprees, mole sauce, texas pete, flavored creamer, stilton cheese, peach colored nail polish, watching instantly feature within Netflix service, the bell that tolls on the bank, humorous people, sierra nevada ale, at this time of year sierra nevada celebration ale, skipjack nuts made by blue crab bay (cause i worked there for the season and they were free!), unexpected good drunk sex, live music - good live music, seeing a good friend after a long separation, dancing with my eyes closed, finding 5 bucks in a pants pocket long forgotten, chilled iceberg chilled martinis straight up with olives, scrapple (if you have to ask then you don't understand), a book that makes me laugh and cry all in one sitting, freshly laundered sweatpants, a surprising moving film, sleeping in and waking up by no alarm, my mom, my pop, thanksgiving, snow when i am snuggled in bed reading, drinking white wine, oh oh red wine, laughing so hard my stomach hurts, my life, and most of all...the knowledge it is never too late, always options out there and it is up to me to get into something so therefore i can get out of it! Happy Holidays Ya'll. Be safe, have fun, rejoice and be merry...very merry indeed.

you tell me...

sunday. the day after...did i have a good birthday celebration or not? i am thinking (ahem cause some of it is fuzzy now) that i did.

oh and check out me and my cute friend miss lara - she made sure i was ok at kellys....ah good friends!

a holiday poem of love

Ode to Sierra Nevada Celebration Ale

#4 in Sierra Nevada poem series

Oh could it be that time of year already?

Not to sound rude, not to be petty

But alas I now need to focus on my true love,

The one the only, the one I place of others above.

This is correct, to be precise, the ale of choice

Sierra Nevada Celebration Ale, my one that possesses no vice!

For the long, cold nights of winter

I choose no other for which I would surely take a splinter.

You are so wonderfully robust and rich

With your flair of intense aroma without asking twice I shall be your bitch.

Your soul is dry-hopped for a lively flavor

I cannot, shall not falter, stammer or waver

As I now proclaim you to be the best beer ever made!

Perfect for a festive gathering or a night at home getting laid.

Oh how I cherish your Chinook bittering hops,

Alcohol content of 6.8% by volume make me lick my chops.

With your fermenting Ale yeast I fear I may just faint.

Please be sure to catch me you devil you, for with your labels I could paint...

my bathroom walls

my admiration and respect for you like a landscape does sprawl.

A true malt of english caramel

I'm honest when I spout, shout even spell

My L-O-V-E for you this holiday season,

For you my sweet I would lie, beg steal and even partake in treason.

As your finishing hops cascade down my eager throat,

my soul explodes with desire, overflows as water in a high rising moat.

I do so need you forever

please oh please push my button...s, pull my lever!

Be mine oh darling elixir,

say you'll make my holiday happy oh please oh kind sir.

Santa is not for me, I only need you

Only you Sierra Nevada Celebration Ale are my mate, only you, the foot that fits this shoe.

a good morning

i woke this morning around 6am to wind and darkness. i stayed in bed, awake, seeing in the dark for a while...listening to the trees talk to me and a bell toll in the distance as it blew over the bank back and forth calling some far off boat, some distant soul maybe. the alarm rang out and i touched the snooze lightly, as if from my mind. not yet i spoke out loud. just let me stay here in this time, this reflection for a moment, many more. a head full of thoughts. of the tax overdue notice received yesterday, of an impeding bornday, of life choices filled with regret, feelings of panic for the future...and yet deep down in my heart a spark of something else, a piece of knowledge so different. something linked, even submerged in harmony. in the country, outside of a small town it is so quiet, so calm that one can often hear a loudness. and then as one wonders at the noise of the quiet, it all goes completely silent. for the first time one can truly hear it, life, themselves...it. i lay there for a while longer and listened to this quietness, to me, to it. a smile slipped across my face even as i threw negative thoughts at it to stop. still it came and now even it still sits. it will not be denied. even when i SHOULD be blue, be down, be afraid i am not. i am more powerful today than ever. the trees remind me so and the bell shouts out to me all is possible. a new beginning came to me this morning in the dark. it traveled across the mountains, through the trees, and over the creek to get to me. i owe it a chance after all of that travel. and so i offer that as i have nothing else to give.

hard to believe...

i woke up this morning and it hit me! my birthday is this sunday. where the hell did the time go? could it be true? wow. i was in my birthday week and did not even realize it. hard to believe...what do i want i wonder...it not to be my birthday on sunday perhaps. is that too cynical, too dark? shall ponder on it and get back to ya.

"Maury, What happened?"

First, The First Wednesday show last week was fantastic!
If you were there then you know...if you were not then shame shame on you! fun crowd, amazing talent (including a pretty decent little set by yours truly...tried some new stuff and it got a nice response...aka laughter!), and good holiday cheer was had by all or so it looked - and really that is truly the only way one knows yes? YES! why am i smilin? because this was the first full day and night i was totally off the juice! the benedryl juice that is. and apparently, finally, there is an end to the production of snot by one body! beer never tasted so yummy...ok that is a lie. it tastes yummy every and any time. it just felt nice to be walking and feel my whole body as one and not have an out of body experience - i think that is what it is called when one is walking and it feels as if one is directly behind oneself, and awake. i do have to say my ass is quite lovely.
as another update - i went out last eve, after a sweet and laid back volunteer gig at the Cape Charles Bed & Breakfast (be sure to check this hot spot out - a beautiful house and fantastic people run it! - http://www.capecharleshouse.com/) for the Annual Cape Charles Progressive Dinner. Sweet why? We sipped on sweet red wine from a box in short plastic cups (free makes all good even box wine) and laid back why? cause i served wine and tri colored funky cheeses with my gal pals sophie and amy. then done at 10pm, off to The Pub for A, read it kids, A martini on the rocks...dirty, very. so dirty i think it was clean. ha, i slay me with my wit. as a side note? martinis are made of gin AND come in high ball glasses, on the rocks (ice) and not always in that funny looking tall glass, mr downtown!
what a refreshing night. i sober and all around me drunkeness swirled. got hit on by a very odd dude. kept touching my back, leaning on me, entering my face space - ick ick and triple ick! after i turned him down for a date...the pick up line by the way? "so i've been single for some time now and well you are close to my age do you want to try a date sometime?" i know! sexy yes? he still bothered me. i had to leave. well i was planning on leaving around the time it all went down anyway...his antics just propelled me out the door faster. hope all that night got home safely. when i asked one patron who was quite on the loaded side, to say the least, "you are not going to drive are you?" to which he replied, "later" - truly hope that one got home safely. but alas, cannot worry too much on this one. not my job to worry on him anymore.
woke up this morning with no hangover! what a concept. slept in till 9:30am and felt fucking fantastic. my point to all this rambling? ah, well, ok, uh, um, sure, let's see, sure, oh, mmmm, well, actually there is no point. just a ramble. till the next one...

a question for today

if you knew that tomorrow was your last day on earth what would you do today? (everyone else always says "if today were your last day" so i wanted to change it up!). Just saying...

what would i do? i would wear this pink tutu over pjs all day long, drink coffee, read a book, drink cold brews, tell jokes to anyone that would listen, call George Clooney and finally tell him how i feel, call my close friends and talk about people, play a marathon game of "would you rather...or would you..." with my brother, sit on the dock for an hour and not talk and be with the water, track down my latest ex and ravage him, play online solitaire, get a massage, eat fried chicken all day, write on my blog, take a long bath and drink a bottle of red wine, listen to my french music cd, take a nap on the couch with angus dog, laugh with my parents, run a mile and a half, do some laundry, worry about having no money, eat a banana, go to a bar during the day before it gets dark, do some emails, drive on a back road and oh and ah over the changing leaves, and say thanks to the universe for my life. so basically just another day in my life would pass by...

i would NOT...spend all my money in the bank (which would take about an hour at the Dollar Store) cause i mean really what then would i do the next day?

Have a day ya'll! It is December, end of year almost here...and what will you do today? Do it!

you just can't...

you just can't stop the dance, babies!