When do you know?

Yesterday I felt I had hit rock bottom. Then today I realize I am like nowhere near it. I think I scraped my toes, just the tips. I reflected back on something, someone I saw last week. I was driving back to my house around 7am from a boy's house...now don't go thinking ill of me or ask if I charged...he is a steady boy maybe not a boyfriend persay, I think...I don't know we go back and forth so who knows and who really cares! He is a good dude and a fella I like and for now that works. Anyway...I was driving along the highway sorta thinking about stuff, sorta singing along with Bon Jovi, when out of the corner of my eye I saw this dude on, sitting on the railroad tracks. All alone. Tossled hair, old or worn looking clothes, a brown bag bottle of something and a blank stare into the distance. He had that look of not quite a full time resident of homeless town but certianly had been to visit a few times. My first thought? "I hear ya brother!" Then my second thought was "wait a minute! Who the hell do you think you are?" This man is sitting on rail road tracks at 7am on a Friday because he obviously does not have anywhere to go and has been out all night. You? You are driving a car (granted it is not mine but my brother's), to a home (granted it is not mine, but it will be some day), to eat breakfast (this is mine or was once I had poonied up the $2.50 at Mickey Ds) and you are coming from a night out with friends and some cuddling with a warm body. Shut up! And so I did.
Today when thinking about yesterday and my CHOICE that I had or felt I had hit rock bottom, I made myself go back to this sighting and I pondered it. I did indeed realize I was nowhere near the bottom of rock. I don't like to often use others as a barimeter to me in hopes to make me feel better or ok about my life and where it stands at a particular time - I think that does not better you at all just keeps you right there in that stagnet place and there perhaps longer than you really want to be or for most of us can afford to be. Yet the human condition takes me to that place anyway...sometimes. So when I do find myself in this place I at least try to take advantage of it - to not feel better than that person, that man on the tracks, but realize yes things could be much much worse. Afterall, maybe he is just someone that likes an early morning walk along the rails, got tired, sat down to rest, took a swig of "juice" and ponder his life, his rock...somehow I doubt it but hey you never really do know do you? That is not the rub that is the blessing.
My conclusion and mantra then? My toes have some blisters, yes. So what? Blisters heal. They heal even if you do pop em instead of letting them take their natural course - the bottom line is that they heal no matter what path they took to get to that stage...unless of course you're dead! Alas and thankfully, I am not! So up up and away go!