tick tock tick tock

one more, well one and a half more days till no more 2007. What are you doing in these last hours of the year? What will you do in the new year, the big '08? a good friend last night said to me, "it is never too late" - original? nope. heard it before. yet for some reason last night it stroke a chord, hit a note, filled a void, ah you get the jist yes? Indeed it is never too late. So even in these last hours of '07 squeeze all you can out of 'em! Tick tock tick tock...

if only i could actually play

fantastic!

rain, wind, 40 degrees, brrr....nice to know, comforting, brilliant even knowing that someone amazing out there is thinking of me and smilin. thanks kd.

family

a family is a group of people in which you are given.
not by choice nor selection, more so some say by someone up there a livin.
i am not sure on all of that whether it be true or not,
i do only know one is in it with em, all stirring hot in a pot.
often there are days of love, laughter, and support,
and then there are days that follow as if 100 horses upon your chest have trot.
a test you do take with all at one time or another,
you pass, you fail, you float and you smother.
a holiday that causes a rise in emotion and scars
food of soul and taste shines light on healing as does a sky of stars.
a cheer, a smile, a nod of head and again i recall,
that all are my heart, my life blood and all would catch me if i fall.
the rain and wind outside can never freeze my warm heart,
for just down the hall, below downstairs and across the hall
the humans that know me and even when we part
carry me on the sleeve, within their soul, surrounding their heart.

christmas eve is upon us yet again...

what am i thankful for this christmas eve and truly all year round yet often forget or don't stop to reflect on it, even jot it down?

well...

McDonalds french fries, Chesterfield Ale, sushi, willingness to try new things including romantic relationships (even if not romantic, technically), the girls; tash, heather, deb and beth, my accident prone brother, dolan, dr. daddy, ramona, rosemary, and thyme, (hee), mix cds (of course it use to be tapes), chewy sprees, mole sauce, texas pete, flavored creamer, stilton cheese, peach colored nail polish, watching instantly feature within Netflix service, the bell that tolls on the bank, humorous people, sierra nevada ale, at this time of year sierra nevada celebration ale, skipjack nuts made by blue crab bay (cause i worked there for the season and they were free!), unexpected good drunk sex, live music - good live music, seeing a good friend after a long separation, dancing with my eyes closed, finding 5 bucks in a pants pocket long forgotten, chilled iceberg chilled martinis straight up with olives, scrapple (if you have to ask then you don't understand), a book that makes me laugh and cry all in one sitting, freshly laundered sweatpants, a surprising moving film, sleeping in and waking up by no alarm, my mom, my pop, thanksgiving, snow when i am snuggled in bed reading, drinking white wine, oh oh red wine, laughing so hard my stomach hurts, my life, and most of all...the knowledge it is never too late, always options out there and it is up to me to get into something so therefore i can get out of it! Happy Holidays Ya'll. Be safe, have fun, rejoice and be merry...very merry indeed.

you tell me...

sunday. the day after...did i have a good birthday celebration or not? i am thinking (ahem cause some of it is fuzzy now) that i did.

oh and check out me and my cute friend miss lara - she made sure i was ok at kellys....ah good friends!

a holiday poem of love

Ode to Sierra Nevada Celebration Ale

#4 in Sierra Nevada poem series

Oh could it be that time of year already?

Not to sound rude, not to be petty

But alas I now need to focus on my true love,

The one the only, the one I place of others above.

This is correct, to be precise, the ale of choice

Sierra Nevada Celebration Ale, my one that possesses no vice!

For the long, cold nights of winter

I choose no other for which I would surely take a splinter.

You are so wonderfully robust and rich

With your flair of intense aroma without asking twice I shall be your bitch.

Your soul is dry-hopped for a lively flavor

I cannot, shall not falter, stammer or waver

As I now proclaim you to be the best beer ever made!

Perfect for a festive gathering or a night at home getting laid.

Oh how I cherish your Chinook bittering hops,

Alcohol content of 6.8% by volume make me lick my chops.

With your fermenting Ale yeast I fear I may just faint.

Please be sure to catch me you devil you, for with your labels I could paint...

my bathroom walls

my admiration and respect for you like a landscape does sprawl.

A true malt of english caramel

I'm honest when I spout, shout even spell

My L-O-V-E for you this holiday season,

For you my sweet I would lie, beg steal and even partake in treason.

As your finishing hops cascade down my eager throat,

my soul explodes with desire, overflows as water in a high rising moat.

I do so need you forever

please oh please push my button...s, pull my lever!

Be mine oh darling elixir,

say you'll make my holiday happy oh please oh kind sir.

Santa is not for me, I only need you

Only you Sierra Nevada Celebration Ale are my mate, only you, the foot that fits this shoe.

a good morning

i woke this morning around 6am to wind and darkness. i stayed in bed, awake, seeing in the dark for a while...listening to the trees talk to me and a bell toll in the distance as it blew over the bank back and forth calling some far off boat, some distant soul maybe. the alarm rang out and i touched the snooze lightly, as if from my mind. not yet i spoke out loud. just let me stay here in this time, this reflection for a moment, many more. a head full of thoughts. of the tax overdue notice received yesterday, of an impeding bornday, of life choices filled with regret, feelings of panic for the future...and yet deep down in my heart a spark of something else, a piece of knowledge so different. something linked, even submerged in harmony. in the country, outside of a small town it is so quiet, so calm that one can often hear a loudness. and then as one wonders at the noise of the quiet, it all goes completely silent. for the first time one can truly hear it, life, themselves...it. i lay there for a while longer and listened to this quietness, to me, to it. a smile slipped across my face even as i threw negative thoughts at it to stop. still it came and now even it still sits. it will not be denied. even when i SHOULD be blue, be down, be afraid i am not. i am more powerful today than ever. the trees remind me so and the bell shouts out to me all is possible. a new beginning came to me this morning in the dark. it traveled across the mountains, through the trees, and over the creek to get to me. i owe it a chance after all of that travel. and so i offer that as i have nothing else to give.

hard to believe...

i woke up this morning and it hit me! my birthday is this sunday. where the hell did the time go? could it be true? wow. i was in my birthday week and did not even realize it. hard to believe...what do i want i wonder...it not to be my birthday on sunday perhaps. is that too cynical, too dark? shall ponder on it and get back to ya.

"Maury, What happened?"

First, The First Wednesday show last week was fantastic!
If you were there then you know...if you were not then shame shame on you! fun crowd, amazing talent (including a pretty decent little set by yours truly...tried some new stuff and it got a nice response...aka laughter!), and good holiday cheer was had by all or so it looked - and really that is truly the only way one knows yes? YES! why am i smilin? because this was the first full day and night i was totally off the juice! the benedryl juice that is. and apparently, finally, there is an end to the production of snot by one body! beer never tasted so yummy...ok that is a lie. it tastes yummy every and any time. it just felt nice to be walking and feel my whole body as one and not have an out of body experience - i think that is what it is called when one is walking and it feels as if one is directly behind oneself, and awake. i do have to say my ass is quite lovely.
as another update - i went out last eve, after a sweet and laid back volunteer gig at the Cape Charles Bed & Breakfast (be sure to check this hot spot out - a beautiful house and fantastic people run it! - http://www.capecharleshouse.com/) for the Annual Cape Charles Progressive Dinner. Sweet why? We sipped on sweet red wine from a box in short plastic cups (free makes all good even box wine) and laid back why? cause i served wine and tri colored funky cheeses with my gal pals sophie and amy. then done at 10pm, off to The Pub for A, read it kids, A martini on the rocks...dirty, very. so dirty i think it was clean. ha, i slay me with my wit. as a side note? martinis are made of gin AND come in high ball glasses, on the rocks (ice) and not always in that funny looking tall glass, mr downtown!
what a refreshing night. i sober and all around me drunkeness swirled. got hit on by a very odd dude. kept touching my back, leaning on me, entering my face space - ick ick and triple ick! after i turned him down for a date...the pick up line by the way? "so i've been single for some time now and well you are close to my age do you want to try a date sometime?" i know! sexy yes? he still bothered me. i had to leave. well i was planning on leaving around the time it all went down anyway...his antics just propelled me out the door faster. hope all that night got home safely. when i asked one patron who was quite on the loaded side, to say the least, "you are not going to drive are you?" to which he replied, "later" - truly hope that one got home safely. but alas, cannot worry too much on this one. not my job to worry on him anymore.
woke up this morning with no hangover! what a concept. slept in till 9:30am and felt fucking fantastic. my point to all this rambling? ah, well, ok, uh, um, sure, let's see, sure, oh, mmmm, well, actually there is no point. just a ramble. till the next one...

a question for today

if you knew that tomorrow was your last day on earth what would you do today? (everyone else always says "if today were your last day" so i wanted to change it up!). Just saying...

what would i do? i would wear this pink tutu over pjs all day long, drink coffee, read a book, drink cold brews, tell jokes to anyone that would listen, call George Clooney and finally tell him how i feel, call my close friends and talk about people, play a marathon game of "would you rather...or would you..." with my brother, sit on the dock for an hour and not talk and be with the water, track down my latest ex and ravage him, play online solitaire, get a massage, eat fried chicken all day, write on my blog, take a long bath and drink a bottle of red wine, listen to my french music cd, take a nap on the couch with angus dog, laugh with my parents, run a mile and a half, do some laundry, worry about having no money, eat a banana, go to a bar during the day before it gets dark, do some emails, drive on a back road and oh and ah over the changing leaves, and say thanks to the universe for my life. so basically just another day in my life would pass by...

i would NOT...spend all my money in the bank (which would take about an hour at the Dollar Store) cause i mean really what then would i do the next day?

Have a day ya'll! It is December, end of year almost here...and what will you do today? Do it!

you just can't...

you just can't stop the dance, babies!

Zicam? how about ZiWOW!

not that i am hoping they will sponser my next show or anything or perhaps a mysterious check appears in my mail but how about Zicam? Anyone, anyone? My mom has been telling me for over a year, "you got to take the zicam" [picture Elaine from Seinfeld, "you got to see the baby!"] and for that timeframe i have for no reason but that she is my mama, said, "no no whatever" and not used it. then proceeded to get sick from my allergies, be in bed for days, cough up god knows what (and neither do i. i mean if he doesn't know how could i possibly?), and basically feel and look like ultra crap. Last night i started to feel el yucko. Sore throat, stuffed up nose, achy body (assumed at first it was from being out of shape and pretending to be so this last weekend in flag football), and watering eyes. In enters the mama..."you got to take the zicam, i am telling you it works and it is a miracle" Ok ok i will try it. You have to place it up your nose, squirt it, and then inhale. A reason unknown to me and i am sure god as well why this was a difficult feat for me. After multiple tries and then finally application by my MOTHER (many giggles throughout the process) some of the Zicam actually got into my nose passage...passage (S)? And i got to tell you...started to feel better well actually just did not feel worse, get worse. i proceeded to pump that magic juice up my nose passages (made a decision to make em plural...i don't need no stinkin committee) every 4 hours throughout the rest of the evening and the night. This morning? I don't feel tip top, 100% but i got to proclaim, "i feel decent and not sick!" i am killing the allergy cold before it comes fully on and it feels fantastic. i am a soldier in a never ending war and i vow to win this time! So i say to you kids out there as this wishy washy up and down cold hot weather continues on and seems to not be letting go..."You got to take the Zicam at the first feelings of being sick or allergy onset!" [now picture Elaine saying, "Maybe the dingo ate your baby! i said the dingo ate your baby!"] Ok now i got to go squirt it up. Ut oh what if i get addicted? Ah, another entry, later, much later.

Busy Busy!

7 days since my last post? what the hell is wrong with me, what have i been doing? nothing substantial but all good. ate lots of turkey, cranberry sauce from a can (where you open the can and it just slides out, has the can ridges on it?), ham ham, many cocktails and cold beer, danced a lot this last week to good live music, a fantastic DJ, played flag football in perfect football weather, laughed a crap load, did a few things i cannot discuss here - although in the past i would but not now...maybe in the future...watched movies (just discovered that you can download movies from netflix, ah shit i may never leave the house now), and just been enjoying november here on the shore. Heading to Chapel Hill on Wednesday for the week and weekend...in search of the employment thang, catching up with some old friends, and catering a big ole party for 600 doctors at Duke! I wonder if any are GYNs? "does your mama know what you do for a living?" Ah the fall is indeed upon us and aint it grand? Till next time...

i'm tired, achy, foot still swollen, sort of out of it...

but here are some pics from the show...and watched the dvd this eve. overall good. lots of work to do that i have not been doing but at same time loved how it turned out - onward and upward. gobble gobble kids. so much to be thankful for this year. smooches.

you little jerk...well ok maybe not so much...

i stepped on you and cursed you as i scratched, throat tightened, and as i lay in my bed unable to sleep - only counting the hours till my show. i then cheered you as laughter from the audience came rippling over me as i shared our story. out of great pain does come great art, good solid comedy. thank you, you little fucker for the laughs.

the show this saturday...

will have me in it...and unlike this picture above, with some clothes on and sans glasses yet will still be a good one! (pssst...i did have a bath suit on by the by...not sure what my friend Carol is doing in the back ground i was too focused on my modeling technique at the time...)

Please come join me at ESO for The Spoken Word, Saturday @ 7pm.
Only 10 bucks gets you laughs, silliness, poetry, and much more that i cannot share with you now.
See ya there kids.

the country life for me

oh little mice i hear your little feeties on the old wood floors
a scurrying here and there in search of what i can only imagine.
there are no snacks to be had, no cheese to be munched upon
and yet you keep going and making the rustle of plastic
keeping me awake late into the eve, early into the morning.
i am not afraid of you nor send you hate at all
i only fear stepping upon you, blocking your way from frig to
kitchen sink cabinet as the last drop of wine drips into my glass.
i share my warm home gladly with you as my family did for me
so here we are both in search of it all, looking for what i am sure we
know not of and yet we keep scurrying back and forth, here and there.
good night little ones and good luck.

what do you want people? it is 2:30am, no cable and seriously these mice! for such little bodies they pack some noise as they run all about!

when it....

it pours. hectic week this week...picked up some part time work plus some consulting work and the show is this weekend...ack! all good though. if you truly want something done give it to a lazy person IF IF! you know they have 12 other things to get done along with your thing...it is the only way we lazys get anything done. So if anyone has something they need done please let me know. i only have 11 things to get done this week and i need one more to make it all work out smoothly. catch ya round the next corner...

V day Sunday

i am not one to talk in depth about politics, religion, war, patriotism...ah shit wait what the hell do i talk about? it is times like this with questions like that one i just posed where i am glad that this blog gig is not two way interactive!

i did though want to point out that today is Veterans Day - celebrated nationally or in regard to holiday day off, tomorrow, Monday. Times when it is good to work for the governement. man i am on a roll.

anyway...back to it, Michelle...i also don't usually get all gooey inside and spurt out salty solution from my eyeballs (i just wanted to say something besides the words cry or tears) when it comes to this sort of thing (which is odd since i tend to, at least these days, cry a lot at anything - it is like i am in training for some cry fest marathon!) but i did want to recognize that it is Veterans Day and that i am extremely thankful for and to all veterans out there! It is cheesebally, geeky and totally cliche but Freedom ain't Free kids. Thank goodness for that cause this chica got no dough right now for any luxury items.

Hope it was a good sunday for all everywhere.

peace and all that crap. goodnight.